Eine Ode an Sarah Haskins:


Sarah Haskins
is my celebrity imaginary girlfriend

I know she’s not /that/ famous yet,
but I like to get in on the ground floor of celebrity imaginary girlfriends

I’m sure when she hears this song
she’ll be horrified.
Really creeped out.

[bass solo]

Sarah Haskins says the sorts of things
That I think when I’m watching ads on TV

She points out how ridiculously stupid the messaging is
By using sarcastic hyperbole

Bass solo!
[bass solo]

Sarah Haskins compared to Brett Erlich is really tall,
but I bet it’s really just that Brett is just really small because
to me I bet she’d seem like average height ‚cause I’m also
really tall.

(That’s all)


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